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By DG Hear (dghear@core.com)
Where do I begin? I guess when I was just a young buck of nineteen freshly out of high school on his way to college. Like a lot of kids at that time I guess I thought I was hot stuff. I dated a lot and tried to see how many pairs of panties I could get into. God, I loved the challenge. Will she or won't she? That is the question. I had as many wills as I did will nots.
I started college but like most young guys at that time I dropped out eventually. My mind was on the pussy challenge, not studying. I did learn enough in college to land some good jobs.
I was in sales which put me in a lot of homes. Damn, I like that. Most places I stopped were just for business and I took care of it, being one of the top salesmen. Then there were the pussy stops. That's when you could smell it upon entering a residence. The woman, usually alone, dressed in sexy clothes or robes and nightgowns. In these cases I usually got the sale quickly and then did what comes natural with a young buck and a lonely or horny woman of any age.
The hardest thing to judge was determining if the woman was flirting or wanted sex. I didn't want to lose my job for a piece of ass when there was so much out there. I usually let the ladies take the lead. If they brought up sex or made the first move I jumped their bones. I probably passed up a lot of pussy just to be on the safe side.
I eventually met a really nice gal when I was doing a little shopping at the mall. She was just a sweet little thing standing a little over five feet tall, a big bubbly smile and big boobs. As she waited on me I used my charm and tried to get a date. After about the tenth time coming in the store she agreed to go out with me. I was really falling for this girl. I was just hoping she was doing the same.
I still kept my sales job while dating Nancy. We got along great together and eventually made love. Yes, it was love. It was so much different than the sex I was used to. I wanted to please this woman, not just myself. After about ten months of dating, she became pregnant. She was on birth control but I guess we were that one in ninety-nine chance.
In her fourth month of pregnancy we got married. Looking back I guess I wasn't ready to be married. I loved Nancy, I really did, but I was twenty and pretty immature. I thought with my dick. I had sex with a few gals after getting married just because I could. It was different from the loving sex I had with Nancy. More than anything I still believe it was the chase. Just to say I was able to get into a girl's pants and then do it.
I didn't brag about it to anyone but I believe people knew. I was a married guy with a kid on the way. I know people want to call me a bastard, prick, lowlife, and all the other adjectives. I deserve to be called them all. I know that now but then it was just trying to get into any woman's panties. I was an immature kid.
One day Nancy found out I banged one of the girls at the office. She cried and cried and we talked about it. She thought about divorcing me and probably should have. She eventually forgave me. I really began feeling bad about the affair. For some reason at twenty years old I didn't think about my actions until it was too late. Then after I found out what it did to my loving wife, it tore me apart. I vowed never to cheat on her again if she would forgive me.
I kept that promise and tried to be a good husband. The baby was born, a son we named Jacob. We were now a family. We had our problems like any family. We could always use more money. We didn't agree on what to buy. Like any young couple we had a big difference of opinions. But we were able to work them out.
One thing was for sure and that was that after my affairs my love grew for Nancy. I might not have always showed it but it was there. I would die for that woman. Making love to her was fantastic. I believe it was because of the effort both of us put into it. I would do anything to make her climax. To this day, hers is the only pussy I ever ate. I loved sticking my tongue deep into her pussy until she climaxed.
We even tried anal sex about three times. It wasn't all it was hiked up to be. Her ass was so tight it hurt my dick. I used some KY jelly so I could at least get the head in. It did feel good shooting a load in her ass though. She preferred good old-fashioned pussy sex. Didn't make any difference who was on top or if I got her from behind, it was all good. She didn't like to give head. She tried it a few times but I could tell she hated it. I wasn't going to make her do it when she didn't received pleasure from it. I did continue to eat her out. I know it made her feel great.
A couple of years later we had another son, David. We couldn't have been happier. We were truly a family. Probably as normal as they come.
I always wanted to own my own business. To be able to control my own destiny. Nancy and I talked and talked about it. Money was kind of tight with having the two boys and all the other expenses. We finally found a small hardware store. We bought it on land contract and made the business a success. Not a lot of money but enough to survive. I was really happy to have fulfilled that dream of having my own business. A wonderful wife and two sons. Life was good.
Nancy didn't lose all her weight after the second baby. She always talked down about herself. I told her she looked fine. I loved her heavy, skinny, it didn't make any difference to me. Of course she never really believed me but it was true. When I looked at her I didn't think about her weight. Granted that a beautiful sculptured body looks great but I loved Nancy regardless of the weight factor. Besides she was a little overweight, not obese. Hell, I was thirty pounds overweight myself. She would go on diet after diet. Always trying something to take the weight off.
We would argue about it over and over again. She always ended the arguments by throwing the affair up at me even though it was years and years earlier. I guess even though she said she forgave me deep down the negative feelings were still there.
She worked part time in her job while the boys were growing up. After the boys were in high school, she took a promotion in her job. She was a department manager and would make a lot more money. She decided to get back on the diet kick and also joined a health club for women. I didn't mind this since it was an all woman exercise place. Whenever a woman joins a health club and the husband doesn't, it seems to lead to affairs.
I was surprised she stayed with it. She began to lose weight and was feeling good about herself. That made me feel good. I liked her to be happy and if being thinner made her happy then I was happy. Our sex life started to rear up again. Like most married couples it waned for a few years while being busy with the family. Whenever we made love it was good. I guess after so many years of marriage you just sort of take the sex for granted. Sometimes we might go as much as two months without having sex. But then when we made love it was great.
She liked her job and new found body. She just seemed so much happier. Then it happened. She came home and asked if I would mind if she went out with her friends. I said of course not, you've been going out with them for years. She mentioned they were having a girl's night out on Saturday and wanted to make sure I didn't have a problem with it. This just seemed strange. I knew something was bothering her. So I asked her what the problem was.
She just said she was probably going through a menopause phase and her mood swings were probably getting to her. I hugged her and said I loved her and I would always be here for her. She just hugged me back. I felt her shudder a little. I knew we had a problem but it wasn't the right time to face it. I would just have to think about it and decide how to approach her.
On Saturday I watched to see how she dressed to go out with the girls. She just wore a pair of black slacks and a nice blouse. She looked good but to me she always looked good and I often told her so.
She told me where they were expecting to go in case I needed her for anything. Then her friend Pam picked her up and they left. It was bothering me. I had to know what was happening to her. I waited a few minutes and headed out myself. I really didn't want to spy on her because I always trusted her. There just seemed to be something wrong with her demeanor. I had to find out what it was.
Nancy and her friends went to a combination dance hall lounge-night club. It was really big. It was easy to get lost in the crowd. I went up to the second floor on kind of a balcony where I could over see the lower level. I was able to spot Nancy and her girlfriends sitting together in two of the half round booths. They seemed to be having a good time. Maybe I was wrong, maybe this wasn't part of the problem. I ordered a drink and just kind of watched Nancy. I felt bad being there but I needed to know for my own well being.
Nancy's friends were a mixture of married, single and divorced women. Most I have met at one time or another. There were a few there that I didn't recognize. I figured she met them at the health club. After about a half hour a few guys came over and asked some of the girls to dance.
The first couple of times Nancy shook her head ‘no' but after she had a few drinks she agreed to dance a little. I really didn't have a big problem with her dancing but because of the possible problem she might be having, it made me nervous.
She was starting to spend more and more time on the dance floor. I didn't recognize any of the guys. They could have been from work or just strangers out for a good time. I decided to stay for a little while longer to see what was going on. She started to dance a few slow songs with one guy and he was holding her close.
I saw him slide his hands down to her ass and pull her toward him. She just reached back and gently pushed his hands away. He did it a number of times and she continued to just push it away. The last time he grabbed her ass she left it there awhile longer before pushing it away. Then I saw him reach up and touch her breast. He held it there a few seconds and then she again pushed his hand away.
It was bothering me. Should I say or do something? Should I confront her in some way? She wasn't supposed to know I was even here. I was wondering if this went on before or maybe she just didn't want to make a scene. I just didn't know. It wasn't like her to do nothing about it After the song ended she went back and sat with her friends. I was too far away to hear any conversations but some of the girls were laughing or smiling. It could have been about anything.
A few minutes later the girls were finishing their drinks and were getting ready to leave. They were saying goodbye to the other girls and the guys. The guy Nancy was dancing with reached over and gave her a light goodbye kiss. Nothing special, just a light kiss, but it really bothered me. Was I reading more into this than I should have? I know I will never forget it no matter how innocent it was.
I got up quickly and left out the back door, got into my car and headed home. The boys were already in their room watching TV. I just said hi to them and went and made myself a drink. I already had liquor on my breath and figured it would be a good cover.
Nancy arrived within ten minutes and I greeted her. I asked her if she had a good time and she said she did but she seemed a bit nervous. I looked her in the eyes and said, "Nancy, do we need to talk?"
To the best of my knowledge Nancy has never lied to me. I'm sure she has secrets like everyone else but I have never caught her in a bold lie. I could see tears form in the corner of her eyes. She looked at me and said, "Jim, I have a problem and I don't know what to do." and she started crying.
I held her close and hugged her and I asked her if it had anything to do with her girl's night out?
She said, "Yes! No! Maybe... I don't know? Let's sit down, I think we need to talk."
I said, "Nancy, tell me why you are so upset. Start with this evening, what happened?" I wanted her to tell me about tonight because I saw what was happening and could gauge her truthfulness.
"Well," she said, "We arrived at the club and were drinking. I started dancing with a few guys. One in particular. He was touching my butt and breasts and I should have slapped him but didn't. I let him feel me up and didn't stop him. I pushed his hands away and when he put them back I really didn't get mad."
"Nancy, why didn't you stop him? Push him away or something."
She was crying lightly and said, "I liked it, Jim. I wanted him to touch me. I'm so sorry, I can't get these feeling out of my system. It's making me crazy."
"Was this the first time it ever happened, Nancy?"
She started crying again and said, "No, this has been happening the last couple of months and I can't shake it. I want to be touched. I want men to want me."
"MY God, Nancy, have you been having affairs? Have you been fucking other men? Have you been cheating on me?"
She was crying and answering me at the same time, saying, "God, no, Jim, I haven't ever cheated on you. I have never had another man. Never but as of late I have let men touch me. I was hoping it was just a short phase I was going through and you would never find out. I just can't hide it anymore. It's tearing me up inside. I can't live like this. I had to tell you. Jim, I love you so much but I feel like I missed something. You're the only man I've been with. I know you have had other women."
"Stop right there, Nancy. You have thrown that affair up to me for the last 15 years. You are not going to use it against me now to have an affair. Is that what you want, Nancy? My permission to cheat on me, to cuckold me, to make a wimp of me? It isn't going to happen Nancy. I love you with all my heart. I always will but you will not make a fool of me just so you can have some strange fucks. Someone to compare me to."
"Well, Nancy, is that what you want? A chance to have your little flings and then come back home to me after your pussy gets satisfied?"
Nancy replied, "I don't know Jim, I just don't know" as she was crying.
I had tears in my eyes as I told Nancy that she was right. Neither of us could live like this. We both needed time to think. I told her I was going to separate from her for approximately two months. She could live in the house with our sons. I would live in the apartment above my hardware store.
She said, "Jim, I love you. I don't want you to go. I'm just all mixed up. Please don't leave me."
"Two months, Nancy, two months to decide if you want your freedom and new found sex libido or if you want to stay married to me. I have no idea what you are going to do but if you decide to be a fuck slut for anyone I'll apply for a divorce immediately. These two months are for you to decide what you really want, not to see how many affairs you can get in. I will just take it ‘A day at a time' and suggest you do the same."
"Since tomorrow is Sunday I'll gather my personal things and take them to the apartment. I'll also talk to the boys in the morning."
The next morning I told Jacob and David to come into the living room. I think they heard some of the conversation from their room the night before. They sat down as I explained that their mother and I were having some marital difficulties and that I would be living above the store till we got things straightened out. I explained that this was not their doing but was a problem between their mother and I. Nancy was standing behind them with tears in her eyes but not saying a word.
I explained to them that we both loved them very much and that they could talk to either of us at any time. I would still attend their school events. Nothing has changed other than I wouldn't be living at the house. No matter what the future brings they will always have a roof over their heads and won't have to worry about moving and losing their friends.
They wanted to know more but I told them that was all I could tell them for now. I said that their mother and I had some major problems to work out. We would know within two months what the future holds.
My boys were sad as they helped me take my personal stuff to the apartment above the store. I told them everything would be alright and for them to help their mother as much as possible. She needed their love if we were to stay a family. I instructed them to not ask her questions about the separation and help her around the house. They were good boys and I knew they would do what they could. I was only a mile away if they needed me.
Nancy needed time to work things out. I was in a world of turmoil myself. What if I lose her? My life was beginning to turn to shit. What could I do? What could I do? I guess it was all up to Nancy now.
I have some major problems to overcome. I have a wife who has never really cheated on me that I know of and I believe her. She stuck with me through my bad boy days and kept our marriage together. To the best of my knowledge she has always told me the truth. Even though the last truth she told me could end our marriage.
I truly love her and don't want to lose her. I'm not a wimp and never will be. I am willing to fight for her but have no idea of what to do. This is the biggest decision she will ever make in her life. To have an affair or save her marriage. I will not let her do both.
I moved into my apartment above the store. It was lonely there. I missed Nancy so much. I was trying to give Nancy space to make her decision. I spent as much time in the store as possible just to keep myself busy. Business was really picking up and I had a hard time keeping up with all the damn paper work. I liked the sales part but despised the paperwork. I decided I would have to hire someone to take over the bookkeeping soon. I put an ad in the paper for an office person with a background in business. I would interview people in the coming weeks.
My sons stopped by about every other day to help me put up stock and make deliveries. I only had two full time employees beside myself working there. I asked the boys about their mother and how she was doing. They told me she cried about every night and was really down. They said she finally made an appointment to see a doctor.
About two weeks after I moved out, I was in my office doing paper work when Pam came walking in. Pam was Nancy's best friend since childhood. If anyone knew Nancy better than me it was Pam. She has been divorced for a couple of years but she and Nancy were closer than sisters. There is very little that they didn't share.
Pam walked up to me and just blurted out, "You stupid son of a bitch, what in the hell is wrong with you? How could you do this to Nancy?"
I said, "Hold on there, Pam. You don't know. . . ." Then she cut me off.
"No, you hold on, you stupid bastard. Nancy loves you. She has always loved you. She is having problems and she came to you with them., the only person she loves and what the hell did you do? You moved out on her. How stupid can you be? Instead of helping her, you throw her to the wolves. I'm so mad at you I could kill you."
"But, Pam," I said, "she doesn't know what she wants. I can't just let her have affairs. I'm giving her time to work it out, to come to a decision."
"You idiot, she needs love and companionship. She's confused and vulnerable right now. Can't you see what you did? Instead of helping her, loving her and caring for her, you threw her to the pigs. God, I just can't believe you were that stupid to walk out on her. The guys at the store are taking bets on who she will go with. They can all see how vulnerable she is. The one person she loves turns his back on her and says work it out yourself. Jim, you better get your head out of your ass if you expect to save her."
I was stunned to say the least. I thought I did the right thing but now after listening to Pam I think I may have been wrong. I did tell Nancy I'd always be there for her. Then I did walk out. Damn, Pam was right, what a stupid ass I am.
I looked at Pam and said, "What should I do? I'm lost. I just don't know what to do to help her. You know I've always loved her more then life itself. You're her best friend. Didn't you see this coming?"
Pam replied, "Nancy and I have been talking about it for months. Nancy could be going through some kind of change or something. All women are different in their mood swings. Since Nancy joined the weight class she has been around other women who might have influenced her in some way. Made her think differently. Then after her losing fifty pounds other men began to notice her more and complimented her on her looks."
The last thing Pam told me before leaving was to make sure that I was at Ramon's Restaurant Friday at 9:00pm. I could either take Nancy home or kiss her goodbye.
I was in shock. "What the hell did that mean? What are you talking about, Pam? What's going on?"
She replied, "The bosses are having a business meeting Friday at 7:00pm. All middle managers are required to be there. After the meeting there will be dinner and cocktails. It was for management employees only, no spouses. The word out is a couple of managers are going to get Nancy drunk and try and seduce her. I'm not allowed to go because I'm not in management. So there will be no-one there to protect Nancy. They also kind of hinted it's a dressy affair. I think you can guess why."
"Doesn't Nancy know about this, Pam?"
"Yes, but she is part of management and is required to go. She said she would watch her drinking and try to stay out of trouble."
"Pam, thank you for being such a good friend to Nancy. I'll guarantee you one thing. Someone will be there to protect Nancy Friday at 9:00pm. It will be her stupid idiotic husband who doesn't deserve her. No spouses, my ass! This husband will be there."
Nancy Speaks:
I met Jim when we were just teenagers. I was working at the store in the mall when he came in. He kept trying to put the make on me. It was kind of funny. He would come back day after day trying to get me to go out. Then one day I just decided to say yes. He looked at me as though something was wrong since I had turned him down so often.
"Do you really mean it? Are you really going out with me?" as he smiled.
"Yes, Jim, I'll go out with you," I said, "but no funny business."
We started dating regularly. We started making out. He would kiss me and I started letting him fondle me outside of my clothes. I was falling head over heels for him but never wanted to show it. After a few months he started rubbing my breasts inside my clothes. I knew we were going to be getting intimate so I made an appointment at the doctors to get some birth control pills.
I had taken them for about three days when Jim asked me out to the beach. I wore my two piece bathing suit. It was getting late and the beach was almost empty. I can remember it as though it was yesterday. It was when I lost my virginity to Jim.
We were lying on the beach on our blanket when he started kissing me. Then he put his hands under my bathing suit top and started rubbing my breasts. He pulled my top up and exposed my breasts. He took my nipples in his mouth and started sucking on them. I was becoming hot and pulled his head down against my breasts. As I was doing that he slid his hand down into by bathing suit bottom and grabbed my pussy mound in his hand. I had never allowed any man in my pants. This was a first for me.
He started rubbing my mound and then slid a finger into me. I started breathing hard. I have never felt this way before. I knew I was going to let him have me. He slowly slid my suit bottom off me and I figured he was going to mount me but he didn't. Instead he got between my legs and buried his face into my mound. It felt so good. He then had me spread my pussy lips as he drove his tongue deep into me. That is probably why I love him going down on me so much. That was the first sex I ever had.
I was holding his head hard against my vagina. It felt so good. Than he got up on his knees and place the head of his cock against my pussy. He slowly pushed the head in till he felt resistance. I knew it was my hymen.
He looked at me as I closed my eyes and he pushed in hard breaking my hymen and taking my virginity. I screamed out load ‘AAAHHH' then he started a slow methodic motion in and out, in and out. I then felt my first orgasm coming as I screamed out again, only this time in pleasure.
Jim started pumping harder and harder as I was coming and then spewed his love juices deep inside my pussy. He pulled his soft cock out of me and pulled his suit back up. I had tears in my eyes. He asked me what the matter was. I told him I was worried that after he got what he wanted he wouldn't still love me tomorrow.
He said, "I will always love you, Nancy. I will always be there for you."
From that day forward we made love almost every time we were together. I missed two of my periods in a row and went to see the doctor. I told him maybe it was the birth control pills I was taking.
The doctor looked at me and said, "Nancy, you're pregnant."
I said, "But, Doctor, I'm on birth control."
He told me either I started it too late or I was that one in a hundred that got pregnant regardless of the pill. I left his office in a daze.
I went to see Jim and he could see I was upset. He asked me, "What is the problem?"
I had tears in my eyes and said, "I'm pregnant."
He looked at me and said, "I thought you were on the pill?"
I told him, "I was but I got pregnant anyway. I'm going to keep the baby regardless if you want anything to do with me and the baby. I love you but would never trap you."
Jim then got down on one knee, looked at me and said, "Nancy, will you marry me? I promise I'll always be there for you and the baby."
Of course I said, "Yes" and that's how our life together began many years ago.
In the last couple of months I have had a few life changing events. Small in nature, but still life changing. I got a promotion at work. More money, more prestige, I became one of the bosses, part of middle management.
My sons were at an age where I wasn't needed quite as much which gave me more independence. I started working out at a health club to lose weight. I was actually succeeding. I had lost fifty pounds and felt much better about myself.
Jim, my husband, said it never made any difference what I weighed to him. He was my husband and loved me, so he was looking through rose colored glasses. What else could he say? Other men noticed me more and more. I was always being complimented which of course made me feel good. I didn't want an affair with these men but it was nice to be complimented so often.
At the health club I heard different women talk about their sex lives. How men came on to them. How they would tease the men so they would get more attention. Some women would compare the men they had sex with. The penis size and shape, what the men would do just to get in their pants. How many orgasms they had. It was just woman talk but it does make you think.
Looking back on the conversations I noticed that these women talked about sex, not love. Not about relationships and husbands and family. They just talked about sex. When they asked me about my sex life I just smiled. My sex life wasn't a big ball of orgasms, multiple partners or any type of group relationships.
It was a loving sexual communication between husband and wife. Not always gentle but a meeting of two minds and two bodies molded into one. A lasting relationship that went far beyond the fuck and suck that these women talked about. As we said in our marriage vows, to have and to hold, during good times and bad, to cherish and love, to be honest and true to each other till death do us part. I did my best to live by those vows.
Pam and I talked a lot. She knew I truly loved Jim even with his old bad habits. She is a true friend. She helped me understand, even when Jim turned his back on me. He just didn't understand what I was going through. Pam and I talked about my life over and over again. She was the one who suggested I see a doctor. She even suggested a shrink but I told her Jim wouldn't pay out that kind of money just to tell a stranger your problems.
When we had our girls' night out Pam told me in private to watch what I was doing. I was giving in a little too much and might regret it later.
I told her, "The girls at the health club say that they give in a little to get more attention."
Pam just looked at me and said, "Think about it, Nancy. Is attention from strange men really what you want?"
I knew she was right but it felt good to be admired. I let some men touch me just outside my clothes so I could get more attention. I promised myself I wouldn't go any further. After about two months of this type of living, it began to get to me. Men would whisper in my ears how much they wanted me. The things they would do to me.
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