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I was scared to talk to her, nervous about what she would say, and becoming riddled with anxiety about how our relationship, ostensibly a mere friendship, was quickly becoming something more. So, all morning, my thoughts dwelled on Gayle. She was kind and polite, intelligent and witty, quick to smile and share a laugh. And I also thought about what Diane had said, how she could detect a hint of peripheral sadness in Gayle. The more I thought about it, the more I saw it, as well. The evening of her dinner party, now several months past, I remembered how sad she seemed, when I left to return home. And it didn't seem as though she were depressed that the party was over, though she did imply otherwise, rather her sullen mood seemed to be caused by my departure. As time went on, and Gayle and I became closer, this same sense of somberness at parting swept over me, too, leaving my heart feeling empty and alone.

Whenever I wasn't with her, I thought about her. I thought about how she brought so much joy to my life. And, more recently, I began thinking about what a beautiful woman she was, and not simply in terms of character, but physically, as well.

I tried ignoring it, but the truth of the matter is, I was falling in love with Gayle and had been for a very long time.

So, when I called her at noon, I was just as anxious to hear her voice.

"Did you get my card?" she asked.

I was sitting in the teacher's lounge on the couch, holding the phone close to my ear and nearly whispering. There were three other teachers there, but they sat at a table on the other side of the room.

"Yeah," I whispered.

Gayle laughed and asked why I was talking so softly.

"Someone's in here with me," I whispered.

She laughed again.

"So?" she said. "You afraid they might see you smiling or what?"

"No," I replied softly, turning to lean on the arm of the couch, away from the other teachers.

"Yeah, right," she replied with a snort. Then she added with a devilish voice, "Or maybe you're just scared they might figure out who it is seeing you."

I laughed, but quickly glanced over my shoulder. One of the trio turned to see what the commotion was about, but then smiled and turned away, when I grinned and waved.

"That's not true at all," I mumbled.

Then her words suddenly struck home: "...who it is seeing you."

Seeing... That word seemed to carry a certain inference, one that could just as easily be conveyed by the word "dating". And, in a very real sense, it really did feel as though Gayle and I were dating. All the necessary ingredients were there: a few commonalities in terms of interests, likes and dislikes; we enjoyed each other's company and spent a great deal of time together. And sometimes the level by which we communicated went beyond what mere friends would normally traverse, by way of body language and tone. When we sat together, although mainly whenever we were alone, it was side-by-side, our bodies touching. There were also times when she'd lay a hand on me, giving a gentle squeeze or soft rub.

All of this pointed in one direction, and, in my heart, I knew Gayle was attracted to me, as I was to her.

"Are you even listening to me?" she suddenly asked.

I blinked a few times and sat up straight. "Pardon?"

Gayle chuckled, as I mumbled an apology.

"You're too cute," she said.

I smiled, and then closed my eyes.

"Can I ask you something?"

"Sure," she said. "Gotta make it quick, though. I should get back to work here."

"Ok," I whispered.

There was a brief pause, and then Gayle asked what it was I wanted to ask.

I was just about to speak, when she said, "What'd you think of the card?"

I glanced down at the floor and smiled, telling her I liked it. Then she explained how she had bought it for her niece, but never sent it, opting instead to actually buy her a big Easter basket filled with candy and toys. And the more she talked, the more I began to wonder, if she was trying to stall for time, trying to prevent me from asking my question. I sighed into the phone, but she cut me off again, before I could say anything.

"What time you want me to come over?" she asked.

I rolled my eyes, as it was obvious she didn't want me to ask my question, hoping I'd probably forget, what with her constantly changing the subject. I suppose, judging by the tone of my voice, she assumed it to be of a serious nature, but I wanted to ask it all the same.

"Six o'clock," I replied. And, before she could get another word in edgewise, I asked if she liked me.

My heart began pounding, as I waited for an answer.

"Yeah," she whispered softly. "Of course I do. You know that... don't you?"

My heart skipped a beat and my stomach fluttered.

"Ok," I replied. "That's all I wanted to know."

"Do you like me?" she asked quickly.

I nodded slowly, saying, "Yeah."

We were both silent for a few seconds, and I could hear her breathing into the phone.

"Jess..."

"Yeah?"

There was a pause.

"I don't wanna replace him," she said.

I closed my eyes and gripped the arm of the couch.

"I know," I replied tensely. "Thank you."

"But I still wanna be there... Is that ok?"

I curled my toes tightly and took a deep breath.

"Yeah," I murmured. "I'd like that."

Then my senses were jarred, when Gayle suddenly spoke in a louder tone, more pedestrian and breaking the otherwise sedate mood.

"So, six o'clock?" she said. "Want me to stop by the store and pick up anything?"

I closed my eyes again, slowly shaking my head and rubbing my fingers against my temple.

"Sure," I chuckled.

"Ok," she piped. "What should I get?"

I dropped my hand and sighed, rolling my eyes.

"Oh, I dunno," I moaned. "Whatever you want."

"Chips? Dip? Pretzels? Pop? Marshmallows? Apples? Oranges? A pineapple? Some of those, uh, whaddya-call'em fruits... you know, they're red and hard on the outside, but squishy on the inside?"

I laughed, replying, "Pomegranates?"

"Yeah, that's it," she said. "Want some of those?"

"You're a goof," I said with a giggle.

"Ok, then," she said. "I'll grab us some wine, maybe some chips, and... a movie? Wanna rent a movie?"

"Yeah, that sounds good."

"Whatcha want me to get?"

"Eh, I don't care. You pick."

"All righty," she replied.

There was another pause of silence, and then the bell rang out in the hallway.

"I better get going," I said. "I'll see you around six."

"Jessie?"

"Yeah?"

"Is it ok, if I think about you for the rest of the day?"

My stomach fluttered again, and I felt myself become weak at the knees.

"If... Sure, I mean, if you want," I stammered.

"Yeah," she said. "I think I'd like that."

"Can... Can I think of you, too?" I said, as my voice cracked.

"Oh, sure," she replied very nonchalantly. "Yeah, knock yourself out. See ya at six?"

"Ok," I giggled. "Bye... I'll be thinking of you."

"Bye, sweetie."

That may have qualified as the best phone conversation of my life.

That afternoon, when I got home, I rushed about, cleaning the house, vacuuming and dusting, and then I started preparing dinner. I kept glancing at the clock, and the closer the hands got to six, the more quickly I moved. So, by the time it was six o'clock, I was breathing hard, and the ringing of the doorbell sent a jolt through me.

I grabbed a dishtowel and wiped my hands, tossing it onto the kitchen counter. Before going to the door, I stopped by a mirror in the living room to check myself. Satisfied everything was in order, I stepped over to the door and opened it.

Gayle stood there, wearing sunglasses, light blue blouse, and khaki pants. He teeth shone brightly, as she grinned.

"Hey there," she said, holding a plastic grocery bag in one hand and bottle of wine in the other.

I stepped back and invited her in, smiling from ear to ear. And, when I closed the door behind her, the first words to nearly leap from my lips were, "You look pretty." Instead, I quickly checked myself, managing to merely stutter hello. Gayle smiled and handed the bag to me. Then she removed her sunglasses, hanging them from the open collar of her blouse.

My heart was thumping, as she continued to stare at me with that wonderful smile.

"You look pretty," I mumbled softly, letting my eyes fall down to the floor, too embarrassed to let her see me blush.

Gayle only chuckled.

"You, too," she replied. "Now let's eat. I'm starving."

Together, we walked into the kitchen and finished preparing dinner. We sat side-by-side at the kitchen table, eating and chatting about this and that and whatever was on our minds. And after we stuffed ourselves, we cleaned up and put the leftovers away. Then we took our glasses of wine and walked out into the living room. As Gayle sat on the couch, I went over to the television and started the movie. Then I stepped over and sat next to her, once again, side-by-side, our thighs rubbing together.

A short while into the movie, Gayle set her glass on the end table and leaned back. I glanced at her, seeing her relax, and decided it wasn't a bad idea. I handed her my glass, and she placed it alongside hers, and then I leaned back to join her.

We sat there with our hands in our laps, a little awkwardly it seemed, and then Gayle, perhaps sensing this, wiggled around and pulled her arm nearest me from between us, draping it behind me onto the back of the couch.

It seemed an almost instinctual reaction on my part, but when that body contact was lost, I scooted closer to reclaim it, and, when I leaned back, I felt her hand behind me come to rest on my shoulder. And, as we watched the movie, every now and then I'd feel her fingers gently stroke my shoulder, until finally, she was hugging me. I leaned against her and placed one hand just above her knee, and then took a deep breath and smiled, reveling in the modest intimacy we were sharing.

Although the position we were in was fine for a short period of time, after a while, the discomfort was starting to set in for both of us. Every few minutes, one of us would squirm and wiggle, trying to find a position more conducive to the long-term. I finally sat upright and reached to the far end of the sofa, grabbing the pillow there. Then I turned to Gayle and dropped it in her lap, pulled my feet up, and laid my head down on the pillow, resting on my side. She only chuckled.

"Sorta wondered what you were doing," she said softly, resting her hand on me just below my breasts.

I brought my lower hand up to hold the pillow and let the other rest along the upper side of my body.

"You're too squirmy," I giggled.

"Ah," she replied. "Of course... my fault."

Then I chuckled again and pulled her hand up to my lips, placing a gentle kiss on her fingers.

"You're still a good person," I laughed, returning her hand to my chest.

As we continued watching the movie, Gayle would sometimes rub her hand on my abdomen, until eventually, the tips of her fingers were making contact with the underside of my breast. But it didn't bother me. The truth is, I enjoyed the physical contact, and knowing it was from her made it all the more desired.

But, being mere mortals, eventually nature steps in and momentarily throws a wrench your way.

Gayle's fingers were now overtly touching my breast, though gingerly, but my bladder began causing me grief.

I quickly sat up and excused myself, and, as I stood, Gayle asked if I wanted her to pause the movie. When I glanced down at her, the expression on her face seemed almost apologetic, as if she were sorry for crossing some sort of physical boundary with me. But, I smiled, relieving her of any such superfluous concerns.

"Sure," I replied. "Just gotta run to the bathroom."

She grinned, and her face relaxed.

"Ok," she said, with a nod.

A few minutes later, I returned, and Gayle was sipping from her glass of wine. As I sat down next to her, I waited, as she clicked the remote control and started the movie once more. Then I resumed my previous prone position.

When I laid my head down in her lap, her hand didn't return to its previous place, and I began wondering, if indeed she thought she had gone too far with her tactile contact. So, to alleviate her concerns, I lifted my head and glanced over my shoulder.

"Where's your hand?" I chuckled.

"Here," she replied, rather bemused and holding it up.

I reached up and took it in mine. "Gimme that," I snorted and pulled it down across my torso, letting it come to rest on my lower breast, my hand atop hers. Then I pulled my chin in and gave the tips of her fingers a quick kiss.

As time pushed on, in the course of getting comfortable, I let the hand I held atop hers drift away alongside my body. She kept hers in place, and soon Gayle was cautiously stroking my breast, cupping it in her hands and wrapping her fingers around it.

By the time the movie ended, the hesitancy in her hand was no longer present, and Gayle was openly groping my breast, gently rubbing her hand around and occasionally giving it a soft squeeze. So, as the video rewound in the VCR, I closed my eyes and rolled slightly more toward her, affording her easier freedom of movement with her hand and silently giving approval to her pleasant ministrations.

I soon felt her hand slowly move to the valley between my breasts, where her fingers plucked at the buttons. She carefully loosened one, and then, in a very tender voice, asked if it was ok for her to do so. With my eyes still closed, I smiled and nodded.

Her fingers slowly loosened one, then two, and finally the top three buttons of my blouse. She parted the front of my shirt, revealing the bare skin above my breasts, and then laid her hand flat against it, taking up a smooth motion, gliding it over my skin.

"That's nice," I whispered, and then carefully rolled onto my side again, while Gayle continued to slide her hand inside my open blouse. I propped my head up onto my elbow, and we continued watching television, though I'm sure her thoughts, as mine, were concentrating on the intimate physical contact we were making.

When Gayle's hand moved further down my chest and cupped my breast again, I let my eyes slowly drift shut, enjoying the warmth of her gentle touch. Then I pulled my hand out from under my head, letting it rest down on the pillow.

I'm not sure how long we lay like this, as my mind began to wander and drift, losing all sense of time and place. I felt her hand move to the top of my bra, and her thumb carefully eased itself under the fabric. My breathing came more deeply, and when her thumb brushed against my nipple, a tingle shot up my spine and my body shivered.

"Sorry," she chuckled.

"S'ok," I replied with an easy giggle.

After a short time, Gayle's hand became more emboldened, and her thumb inside my bra gently pinched my erect nipple against her finger on the outside. My eyes drifted closed once more, and my jaw slowly dropped, and, what had started as subtle caressing, evolved to become conspicuous stimulation.

I lay back against her, resting one hand on my stomach, and sighed, as her slender fingers manipulated my breast.

Suddenly, from outside, I heard a car door close, followed by that of another. My eyes shot open, and I quickly sat up and scooted away from Gayle, as my hands frantically fumbled to close my blouse.

It was nearly ten-thirty, and Rachel was home from work, and, by the sounds of it, probably had Kate with her.

When the last button was closed, I reached up to straighten my hair. I glanced at Gayle, giving her a sheepish expression, but she only smiled and slowly shook her head.

The front door opened, and Rachel poked her head inside. When she saw Gayle and I, she stepped in and grinned. Kate was right behind her.

"Thought that was your car," she said, as she unzipped her coat.

As Kate maneuvered around, she unzipped her coat, as well, and gave a somewhat startled expression, when she saw Gayle. I blushed, hoping it wasn't obvious she and I had only a minute before been intimate. For her part, though, Gayle's only reaction was to rest her head against her elbow, brushing the hair from her eyes, and give a quick little wave to Rachel and Kate.

"Hey," she chirped to the two young women.

Rachel slowly walked closer to the sofa, looking back at her girlfriend with a grin.

"We're just gonna go upstairs and hang out," she mumbled, giving me a look of what could only be considered mild amusement.

My head jittered up and down, as I cleared my throat.

"Ok," replied.

Then Rachel seemed to smirk and turned, bounding up the steps with Kate right behind. The latter gave us another friendly wave, and Gayle and I did the same in reply. When Rachel's door was closed, I turned my eyes to Gayle, and her head lolled around to me.

"Sorry," I muttered softly.

Gayle rolled her eyes and chuckled, replying, "No problem."

We sat next to each other for a few minutes, and then heard Rachel's stereo come on. The lively chatter and giggling upstairs soon died down, and it very quickly became embarrassingly obvious what was likely going on up there.

"Want something to drink?" I asked tensely, trying to distract Gayle from pondering it, as well.

"Nah, I'm fine," she replied with a casual wave of the hand.

Feeling a bit humiliated and ashamed of myself for jumping away from her so quickly, I moved closer and placed my hand on her thigh.

We sat and watched television, flipping from one channel to the next. Then from upstairs came a light giggle followed by what anyone would recognize as an amorous moan.

I cleared my throat and held the remote out in front of me, changing the channel.

"Late night TV sorta sucks, ya know?" I stated frankly, once again trying to distract Gayle's attention.

"Yep," she replied tersely.

I turned to her, saying, "You ever watch..."

But then another soft moan tumbled down the steps. Gayle leaned her arm against the side of the couch, resting her head against her hand, and snickered.

"Watch what?" she replied, raising her eyebrows and going along with my futile game of polite ignorance.

As I struggled to find my words and collect my thoughts, Gayle sat there with a knowing grin on her face.

"Go on," she chuckled, twirling her hand. "I'm listening... to you, I mean."

"I... Well, I was just gonna say..."

Then Rachel's muffled voice overtook me.

"Ow, bitch! That's my ass."

Gayle's face suddenly contorted, as her eyebrows rose high, and she covered her mouth and laughed with a snort.

My eyelids fluttered from embarrassment, apparently signaling Gayle to let loose entirely. She fell forward and slapped her hand on my knee, as I sat there shaking my head back and forth.

"Wanna go back to your place?" I asked dryly.

Gayle was still in a fit of giggles, but managed to jerk her head up and down.

"Sure," she replied.

I jumped from the couch, as Gayle pushed her hands against her knees, forcing her body upright.

I darted to the kitchen and closed the bottle of wine, and then quickly stored into the refrigerator the left over food. When I turned to leave, Gayle was standing in the doorway with her coat on and mine draped over her forearm. I flipped off the kitchen light, and she handed me my coat.

Out in the living room, I searched for pen and paper to leave Rachel a note.

"Whatcha lookin' for?"

"Something to write on," I huffed.

I'd found a notepad, but was still looking for something to write with.