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By Grumpy (address withheld)


"Dad, we've sorted all of Mom's stuff, loaded the things we want and left the things you requested."

Sue (age 21) and Alex (age 24) entered the room and sat on the sofa opposite my favorite chair.

"May we talk with you before we leave?"

"Dad, it's been almost a year since Mom left us and both Sue and I are concerned that you are becoming a recluse."

Alex continued without waiting for a reply from me, "It was obvious to us that you and Mom had a very solid marriage that other couples can only dream of, but isn't it about time that you started considering a social life that would allow you to meet others?"

"Dad, we would understand and, as a matter of fact, would encourage you to meet other women. You're still young and need companionship."

"Dearest Sue," I chuckled, "since the day your mother entered my life, I knew she

was the only person I could be happy with, I've never met another that I thought had those special qualities your mother possessed. I don't believe there will ever be another person that can take her place."

Twenty minutes later they finally gave up on the conversation and rose to leave, Alex back to his job in San Francisco and Sue to her studies at UC Davis.

As we said our goodbyes in the driveway, Alex suddenly asked "What is in the locked storage box that Mom labeled 'Investment'?"

I noted the quick glance Sue gave me but did not acknowledge it before replying "That contains your mothers personal notes on an investment she and I made about a year before you were born. It has significance only to me and is something that neither your mother nor I wish anyone else to see. Don't worry, it is not something the SEC or any other party would be interested in."

"What kind of investment was it?" Alex asked.

"The use of the word 'Investment' is misleading; it was more of a plan for our life and as such is something very personal." I replied.

The moisture that welled up in my eyes put an end to the conversation but I knew that one day the subject would again arise.

Memories Can Return At Any Time -------------------------------

I had worked late but was determined to visit the gym before going to the leased condo to get some much needed sleep.

On the way to the gym I stopped at small caf‚ to purchase some coffee, Jennifer was the sole waitress on duty and as I watched her take the order of the customer ahead of me, something about her demeanor and the care she put into the encounter with the customer piqued my interest.

I had not had time or interest in the opposite sex while in high school or in college, I was too busy with my life to be bothered. There was the company to form, the financing to arrange, talent to hire and myriad other details to manage. At age 26, I capitalized on the dot.com boom and sold the company for an amount that would guarantee my future but like a lot of dot.commers I was not content and immediately started on the next company anticipating the boom in wireless communications.

When Jen took my order for coffee, there was a brief intense look between us and a sly glance back as she walked away. The gym was forgotten and I knew that I had to know this young woman.

Six months later we were married and after a brief honeymoon cut short by company business we settled into domestic life.

The honeymoon was awkward considering that we were both virgins and that I was rather well endowed but we both made it through the ordeal with our hopes for the future intact.

Domestic life was beautiful with each partner sharing the workload attendant upon newlyweds. Jen had an eye for detail and was soon completely in charge of dealing with the architects designing and building our house near Sutter Creek.

The only fly in the ointment was the sex. Jen was a willing but silent partner, she never expressed emotion while having sex and was never willing to talk about her needs or desires. She seldom initiated sex but never refused sex leading me to believe that she was not that interested so sex became something that was not talked about and seemed to be my soul responsibility.

Sex with Jen could only occur in a darkened room with bed covers pulled to the neck. I never saw her nude or even in her underwear. As a matter of fact, the only time I saw her underwear was when I went to the basement laundry basket to retrieve a card I had left in a shirt pocket. Her underwear consisted of white cotton panties and matching bra.

She would not look at me in my underwear and would leave the room or turn away if I were nude.

The consequences of her shyness and my lack of experience was a gradual decline in our love making although it didn't seem to affect our relationship. Kissing, cuddling, and hugging (although hugs were not those between lovers) were frequent and our communications on all subjects except sex were filled with understanding and love.

A year into the marriage, I was in Sacramento taking care of business details and staying at the condo while Jen was overseeing the final phases of our home construction. She seemed to be in a world of her own planning the interior design and shopping for the right furnishings, a world in which she seemed perfectly content.

It was after midnight when I drove into the condo garage, Jen's car was there.

I looked forward to seeing her and to sharing some time with her but was confused as to what could have brought her into Sacto at such a late hour. When I had talked with her on the phone at about 6:00 she had not mentioned a trip but had asked when I would be returning to Sutter Creek.

She was sitting on the couch with her knees drawn to her chest when I entered and would not look directly at me when I greeted her. It was obvious something was deeply troubling her so I deposited my work products on the desk, sat down beside her, took her in my arms and asked what was troubling her. She began to cry, which is something I could never fathom as I believed every problem had a solution and was in itself but a small pebble on the walkway of life.

After about ten minutes of holding her while she soaked my shoulder she finally blurted out "You don't make love to me anymore". I waited for the aftershocks to this domestic earthquake but none were forth coming and so I ventured into territory where few men fare well.

In business I learned to not assign blame but to define the problem and look for a solution. In this case I knew my assumptions about Jen's needs where a large part of the problem, I had assumed that Jen's silence on the subject and her lack of response during and after lovemaking was a statement from her about her needs and desires. I learned through the start and stop conversation that lasted until 3 in the morning that I was wrong. Jen enjoyed lovemaking but she didn't know how to enjoy it or how to make it more pleasurable for both her and myself. I shared as much of the problem as she did.

The following morning after a leisurely breakfast I asked Jen if she would be willing to stay in Sacto for a couple of days while I did some soul searching and sought a long term solution to the problem. I also knew that counseling was part of the solution but would not work unless both were willing to venture risk and accept new ideas. I told her that I did not want years of therapy or counseling that achieved little other than enriching the coffers of some shrink that really didn't care about our problem.

I told her I wanted to contact my college roommate whom I had a lot of respect for and who was completing his internship in a major hospital in New York. Greg had many of the attributes I consider lacking in most doctors, a lack of ego, a willingness to question and an analytical mind that sought innovative solutions to all problems, no matter how complex or how simple. The key was he sought a solution, not a quick fix or a treatment of the symptoms but rather a solution.

It took the full two days to establish contact with Greg and when I explained as best I could the problem, he laughed and in a told you so voice, kidded me about not following his advice in college and getting some experience while the playing court was open. He then grew serious and asked if I could hold out for a few weeks until he had some time off. He would talk with some respected friends about the problem, would then travel to Sacramento and after spending some time with Jen and I, offer his suggestions as to possible solutions. He would also get some references for counselors in the Sacramento area.

I got dates and times from him and had the travel agency that handled business travel book the necessary transportation.

Greg spent almost an entire week with us. The press of business took me away on a few occasions but they seemed to be quite at ease in each others company and both stated that they needed some time without my presence.

On the day before Greg left, he spent a lot of time talking with Jen and when finished he asked both to join him on the veranda to enjoy the sunset.

He started by saying that never had he met two whom where so deeply in love and so committed to each other. That, in itself, was part of the problem; we were both so conscious of the others feelings that neither was willing to take risk that might even hint at damaging the respect we had for each other.

He then proceeded to lay out his solution to the problem and forbid either of us to interrupt until he had finished. He also asked that we not even discuss his proposed solution until we had given it some thought for at least a day.

Two days after Greg's departure I asked Jen if she was ready to talk, with the affirmative, we migrated to our favorite spot on the property and tried to start the conversation. Jen finally blurted out that she was reluctant but willing to try the solution offered. She stated that she viewed the solution as an investment in our future, one which would pay rewards through to the winter of our life together.

I responded that I was having a terrible time accepting my role in the solution but felt that there was an alternative path at least for me. I would support Jen in her part of the solution but would rely strictly on her to teach me my role.

The conversation continued for another two hours until each was assured that there was no danger to our marriage. We then sat together until Jen finally, in a hesitant voice, asked if I would make love to her then and there (she had never before asked me to make love to her). I did not wait for a second request and for the very first time made love to my wife in other than a darkened room. Afterwards while holding each other, I heard for the third first of the day, a whisper from Jen "That was so good!"

The Investment --------------

After a month of joint counseling we were finally ready for the second part of the investment, the part that Jen would pursue. She had told me that she would keep a journal and that I was free to read it at my leisure.

Jen would need to spend two days per week in Sacto but would return home each night (unless, of course, I was at the condo).

When Jen returned after the first session, she asked if I had exercised, I replied no and she responded that she needed some exercise.

We decided to run and after about three miles she turned towards home and motioned for me to follow. When we completed our run she headed for the pool and dove in without changing into her swim suit. On emerging with her t-shirt plastered to her upper body and her jogging trunks outlining the curve of her bottom she marched straight up to me and told me to remove my shirt and lie face down on the lounge. She proceeded to give me a full length massage, tossed a towel over my head and asked me to roll over.

When I rolled over the towel was replaced on my face and she then asked be to raise my hips, I felt her tugging at my trunks and assisted her as best I could in removing them. There was silence for the longest time as I assumed she was looking at my nude form for the first time, she then giggled saying "You're not the average bear, are you?" She then gingerly lifted my penis and scrotum, doing a thorough inspection as I began to harden.

"My, you're defiantly not the average bear."

I asked what she had to compare me with and she giggled in response "You can read my journal."

"Keep that towel over your face and try to stay relaxed."

I felt her wipe a drop of pre-cum from the head and then she started stroking me. The soft touch of her hand had an immediate effect as I grew even harder and within a matter of two to three minutes it was over as I spurted into the air.

"Well, that certainly helps explain the wet spot. Do you think you can do that again?"

Without waiting for a reply, she threw her leg over me and guided my still hard cock to a very wet and warm opening. I tried to remove the towel but she immediately moved it back into position and told me to relax, this was her time.

With her hands on my chest, she began to make love to me but after a few minutes she stopped moving, the reason obvious as I could feel the contractions in her vagina. I asked if I could remove the towel but she shushed me saying "I still not ready for you to look at me, have patience, it will happen soon." And she began moving again. When we finished she rose saying "I'm going to clean up, will you be a dear and fix dinner?"

Dinner was the last thing on my mind, I wanted to hold her next to me and to enjoy the warm after glow but all I got was a glimpse of a firm bottom bouncing into the house.

Dinner was a quiet affair with many warm glances and endearments passing between us. Jen had a very satiated look with a twinkle in her dreamy eyes.

As we were clearing the dinner table, Jen stopped and gave me a tender hug, "Thank you, you can never imagine how deeply I love you."

Perfection is the only word for the rest of the evening.


When Jen returned after her next trip to Sacto, the scene repeated itself in the exercise room but this time I was the masseuse.

I was on the point of erupting as I massaged her long legs, her firm bubble butt and her perfect skin on her shoulder and back. She kept her legs tightly together and I did not challenge her.

When I asked her to turn over, there was a couple seconds of hesitation and then she turned. This was the first time in over a year of marriage that Jen allowed me to look at her nude body. I didn't look but instead concentrated of her face, bending down to caress her cheek as I kissed her soft lips. I then proceeded to lightly rub her shoulders while continuing to kiss her lips, eyes, cheeks, etc. while my hand continued to her small firm breast with their equally small nipples hardening even more under my touch. I moved to her breast, kissing and putting pressure on her nipples with my tongue as Jen caressed my head and neck. She began shuttering as I worked alternately between her breast and her hard abs and softly exclaimed "Oh! I didn't know it could be this good."

When I moved to her lightly covered Mons Venus, I felt her stiffen so I returned to her face and after kissing her softly I whispered "Relax, this is my time."

This time I started at her feet, slowly kissing my way up those firm long legs and as I neared her, she relaxed her legs somewhat, as I kissed the juncture between her legs and pelvis she began shuttering again and opened her legs fully for me causing me to stop and stare at a perfect Labia with just a hint of the Labia Minor exposed.

"You are so very beautiful!"

"I hoped you would think so, but don't stop with those wonderful lips."

I began my oral exploration, opening those perfect lips and marveling at the soft wet pink lining. I could see a stiff little clitoris poking out at me and as I kissed it, I lightly touched it with my tongue causing an immediate reaction and an, "Oh, Oh, that is good, don't stop my love."

"Dearest, I can' wait, do me now."

I didn't last long but it was long enough as Jen shuttered and tossed her head moaning, "Yes, yes, yes, oh dear lord yes."

AS we lay together, both satiated, Jen began contracting her pelvic muscles and as she felt me stiffening within her, gave me a dreamy, "Can you lead this charge old boy?"

I did lead the charge, across familiar but yet completely new terrain. It was a long charge ending in an unconditional and complete surrender of the parties involved.

As we cuddled, lightly exploring each others bodies, I heard a soft "I want to taste you someday, maybe later this evening."

"Cathy, My therapist, said we should practice the three A's each and every day, but we've always done that haven't we?"

"The three A's?"

"Yes, Attention, Appreciation and Affection I told her we were way ahead on that game."

"Cathy also wants me to move on, in a couple of weeks, to a male therapist but I'm thinking I want to stay with Cathy until I've learned everything she has to offer. I think I want to terminate the session after Cathy and begin exploring on my own."

"Jen, I don't know what switches were thrown in counseling and I don't care. I will support you in whatever decision you make and I so enjoy your exploration."

"Bye the way, I think there might be another explanation for the wet spot."

She laughed when she looked down at herself, "two made that mess."

She jumped up and as that beautiful trim, almost boyish, figure walked out of the room threw back over her shoulder "I'm going to clean up and start dinner, you clear up here and then come help me. I think raw oysters are going to become a staple."

Each week when she returned from her therapy sessions was a new adventure, once she announced on arrival that there was a Flame Tokay grape that was causing her some problems and it was my job to remove it without using my hands.

Once she announced that she wanted to make love on the diving board of the pool and was in the process of disrobing as she walked out the door and almost collided with the pool maintenance guy. That dampened her spirit of adventure.

She challenged me in the exercise room, saying that she bet she could complete more exercises than I did. I took the challenge. When Jen was about half way through her routine, she suddenly stripped and started doing a series of stretches on the exercise mat. Some of the positions she assumed caused me to lose all interest in my routine. She smiled and said "Some of these positions are straight from the "Kama Sutra" they only need someone to complete the picture". I didn't hesitate and when I was fully into her, she commented that I was reaching places unexplored.

She really enjoyed oral sex and was not the least hesitant in asking for a little attention. She never volunteered to give head which was okay with me as I had some deep hang-ups about that part of oral sex (she may have recognized the reluctance on my part).

Then one day she returned from Sacto in an apprehensive mood. She finally admitted after a few questions that she was concerned because at Cathy's urging had finally moved on to a male therapist and that she had enjoyed it very much. Her concern was how I would respond.

I ask if it was beneficial to her and she admitted she was learning things about her body and her sexual nature that Cathy could not teach her. She also said she had a lot of things to show me.

I ask about the sessions and she said that it was clinical sex not lovemaking and although she did enjoy it was not as satisfying.

I ask if she was going to continue the sessions and she almost tearfully replied that she would like to for at least another two weeks if I didn't have any objections. I asked why two weeks and she shyly said there were three male therapists on the staff and Cathy had said they were arguing amongst themselves about who would work with her.

"Do you love me and do you think there is any possibility of that changing?"

"You know I love you and that will never change. I have discovered a sexual part of me that was repressed and I am enjoying it but that will end now if you say the word."

Conflicting emotions rose to the surface and had to be physically constrained. I knew this was part of the therapy we had originally agreed upon. That original agreement had me in therapy session with the female side of the clinic but I had opted out knowing that Jen was the only one for me.

After a few minutes of tug-of-war with emotions I replied that this was the solution we had agreed upon and I would live with that decision.

The session lasted two more weeks and then she announced the contract was completed.

Our life together was idyllic and our lovemaking was always beautiful albeit somewhat non-ordinary. Jen had developed extraordinary vaginal muscle control and once brought me to ejaculation with out me moving at all.

It was a warm summer morning when I awoke laying on my side and with the usual morning erection. Jen was positioning herself in a spoon position, guiding my cock into a very wet vagina. She said don't move and then proceeded to milk me using only those muscles.

Another time she announced that the only way I would have her was to physically rape her. After a chase through the house and a wonderful wrestling match on the bed, I finally had her tied to the head board with her bra and shirt. I then proceeded to explore every part of her body paying particular attention to those parts that I knew, from our discussion about what each liked, were most enjoyable to her. When the wet spot had grown to an unbelievable size, I positioned myself and tried to enter but her muscle control was so good that it was almost impossible. When I finally bottomed out, she relaxed and I untied her arms to enjoy a most refreshing encounter.

As we lay next to each other basking in the afterglow, she casually mentioned that she had stopped taking her birth control pills. Nine months later, Alex was born.

Our lovemaking became more circumspect after Alex's birth but no less exciting and no less frequent.

She announced one evening after Alex was asleep, that she had been drugged and would be found on our bed, comatose, and the special person whom found her had better take full advantage of her. For a comatose person, she squirmed and moaned as I explored her body. Her eyes opened briefly and a smile appeared when I inserted a finger into her anus, not my cup of tea but something to investigate. As I made love to her, those wonderful vaginal muscles seemed to be unaffected by her comatose state.

We were actually escorted from the Eiffel Tower when Jen decided we should find a place to make love (not too many places for privacy on the tower). We did slip away from the tour group at Macau Picu for some high altitude love making. We lived for a month on a beach in Tahiti with all three of us nude and somewhat sunburned most of the time. I think we entertained some natives in the Australian outback (we didn't notice them until we were well involved).

It was a couple of years later when Jen asked if I had time to talk with her?

Jen was waiting just like she had some many years ago, with knees drawn to her chest and an apprehensive look. She blurted out without prompting that she had accidentally met Cathy (her therapist from years ago) in a Starbuck's in Sacto and in the course of the conversation, Cathy had mentioned there was a new male therapist at the clinic with a nickname of "Horse". Cathy assured Jen the nickname was quite appropriate as Horse was the largest (both in length and girth) of anyone she or any one else at the clinic had ever known.

Jen continued with a rush, that she had been thinking about Horse and would like to experience a really big penis, I was big but not as big as Horse was reported to be and she loved me more than I could imagine. She assured me there was no danger to our relationship and it would be recreational, not lovemaking.

Hit between the eyes with a ten pound sledge hammer was the only way to describe my reaction.

When my heart rate returned to normal and I could again focus on objects in the room, I asked if I could think about it?

Jen nodded and asked if I could make a decision by the next day?

"Why by tomorrow?"

"I made arrangements to meet Horse at the condo on Thursday and will need to cancel if you don't want me to see him."

"It sounds if you've already made up your mind to go through with this fantasy."

"Only if you agree, I meant what I said about my love for you."

The next morning, after a night of no sleep and with deep anxiety, I told Jen that if she really wanted to do this, I would not stand in her way.

Jen knew what she had in her marriage and although I didn't like the proposal, I knew that it would affect our relationship more if I refused, it would look as if I didn't believe in the Jen's strength and her love for me.

"Can you be there for me?'

"No, it's not one of my fantasies, but I will meet you at the condo afterwards."

I arrived at the condo at about 5 o'clock and found an unfamiliar car parked in the reserved space next to Jen's car, I immediately left and drove to the local Deli to purchase greens for a salad that Jen likes. When I returned to the condo at about 5:30, the car was gone.