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Chapter Four

Now was the time to enjoy myself with his chest hair, and that's what I did. I ran my fingers through it and curled it around them. I teased his nipple and squeezed his muscles. Mark had his eyes closed, but his free hand managed to find my breast and he squeezed it gently. I thoroughly enjoyed these moments, because now the time was getting close that either Mark would fall asleep or Mark would decide he was going home. At least there was no pillow talk, and I was thankful. 'Was it good for you?' is such a destructive question. If it was, you were usually pretty sure about it. If you weren't sure about it, it was a bad idea to ask.

While playing with Mark's chest, I glanced down at his penis. It was limp, very slick and not nearly as fearsome as it had been a few minutes ago. I smiled, in a way proud that I had tamed that monster, though it felt I had nearly sacrificed myself in doing so. My eyes wandered and found the clock, and I was surprised it was only twelve thirty. Two and a half hours ago we were kicked out of the gym, and here we were recovering from tonight's real work out. At that time I considered I was probably going to get a good nights sleep and still be on time for work the next day.

Mark lifted my head and began kissing me softly again. He hadn't fallen asleep after all, but perhaps this was his goodbye kiss then. I felt a little sorry, because I could enjoy sleeping while lying against his body, even though it would mean a cramped night. I felt his hand stroking my belly, my behind, my hip, and then my breast again. This wasn't feeling like a goodbye kiss to me. Without breaking the kiss, I slowly crept down with my free hand and investigated my suspicion.

After curling through his pubic hair as a diversion I felt a little lower and a shock went trough me. His dick was fully erect again and as huge as ever! Most men I had been with hadn't been able to recover in ten minutes like Mark just did. I think I hid my panic a little better than last time, because Mark didn't break the kiss and continued stroking by breast.

Mark was a good kisser, and I really did enjoy those next few moments. He was kissing me passionately while gently stroking my breast. Meanwhile I was running my free hand through his chest hair again, which still felt very good. Eventually, my hand traveled over his flat stomach through his pubic hair towards his large organ again. I skipped the penis for a moment, and began lightly squeezing his balls.

Compared to his dick, they didn't feel like they were unusually large. But I think if I could have gotten a good look at them I would have been able to say for certain that they were larger than usual. They felt just slightly smaller than a pair of eggs. At least one of them was, and the other was a little smaller than that.

I wished I had gotten to examine Mark's balls before the first time, to see if the size changed after sex. It had felt like he had ejaculated a liter inside of me, but I knew that was just silly. Most of what had been spurted into me a good fifteen minutes ago hadn't come from Mark's testicles anyway.

I began stroking the shaft of his dick. I planned on slowly working my way up to the head, but Mark had other plans. He lifted himself from his lying position and gently pushed me on my back. I expected him to position himself on top of me, but for the moment he had other plans. He turned on his side and wrapped one arm around my shoulder and used his free hand to hold my head as he continued to kiss me. His dick had been draped across my thigh, and while I used one hand to rub through his hair I used the other one to start rubbing the head of his dick. This was clearly a sensitive area, because I felt a few good shivers running through Mark's body while I did that.

Then Mark did what I had expected earlier; he moved on top of me slipped in between my legs. Again he used his arms to keep most of the weight off of me, but still he was pressed up against me nice and cozily. He freed one of his hands for a moment, and guided the head of his penis to press against my still slick opening. He began kissing me slowly again, while using his hips to rub his dick up and down against my pussy. Sensing Mark would need all the room he could get, I spread my legs as wide as was comfortable. Mark responded by pushing upward a little more. This firmly lodged the tip of his penis inside my opening, which clearly was not up to the task just yet. I felt frustrated that only about thirty minutes after being thoroughly opened by Mark, I felt almost as tight as before.

Apparently, Mark didn't mind or he was used to it in a way. He began pushing the tip in and out of my opening, which didn't cause a lot of energetic movement, but did get the juices flowing so to speak. I felt my fluids leaking between my ass cheeks and it tickled like crazy. This was the moment my opening couldn't get any juicier, and Mark apparently noticed this. He stopped his up and down motion and freed one hand once more to guide his dick, or actually to push his dick. After a firm but patient push, and resistance from my tight opening, the slippery knob at the top of his penis slowly slipped inside of me. Mark groaned, and his body stiffened.

He almost came right then and there, the tight sensation being nearly too much for him. After a few moments, he dared to move again, but he did it slowly. Mark's hands returned to my sides, keeping his weight off of me, while still keeping me in a locked position. With slow, pistoning movements Mark eventually managed to squeeze half of his manhood inside of me. With our current position, that was the best that he would be able to do.

While slowly fucking me with half of his length, Mark returned to kissing me deeply. This was a wonderful sensation. My upper half was completely locked into position, and I was only able to move my legs right now. I knew from my limited college experiences, that I would have to lift my legs up to give Mark more access and freedom of movement between my legs. I was having difficulty handling his size, but I was still curious somehow how it would feel to have more of him inside of me. But for the time being, I was enjoying myself too much to change our position.

This slow, half-fucking seemed to go on for hours, though it was probably a few minutes at most. I felt Mark getting slightly irregular at his short strokes. He was trying to pull back a little more each time, and I guessed he was trying to make longer movements. I sensed it was time for action on my part. When he was halfway inside again, I slipped my hands down to his hips to keep him in place for a moment. Then I lifted my legs up as far as I could effectively folding myself and completely exposing myself to Mark. This gave him complete access and he knew it. He broke the kiss for a moment and gave me a heartwarming smile as if I had just done him the biggest favor ever.

Mark lifted himself up, supporting himself with his arms and pulled his dick out almost completely, then slowly pushed back in almost as far in as it would go. Very slowly he began pushing in and out again, opening up a new region inside of me with every push. After what seemed like a very long time he was sliding almost his entire length in and out of me with every stroke. He started to speed up, still making those long strokes in and out of me. Mark's head was starting to turn red and he was sweating; clearly this was an effort for him as well. Audible slurping sounds were being produced as well, if it wasn't so good it would be almost gross.

And how was I feeling during all of this? I couldn't begin to describe it. First of all, I had never had actual sex for this long before. And Mark was screwing me with by far the largest dick I had ever had inside of me. The only way I can put it, is that I was being thoroughly fucked. I didn't climax, but I felt some sensations I never felt before, that was for sure. I could feel his entire dick inside of me all the time, stretching my insides every time again. I was too tight for Mark, and only the large quantity of slick juices made all this possible. So despite the obvious effort, it was a heavenly experience.

I wasn't being pinned down any more, the only contact between us was Mark's dick inside of me, so I had complete freedom of movement. At first my arms were limply lying on the bed, but soon enough I needed them to keep my legs up. I wasn't going to keep this up much longer. Then I felt Mark shortening his strokes, keeping himself as deep inside of me as he could. He was about to come, and I decided I wanted to be a part of it. I pulled him towards me with my arms and legs around him and I kissed him deeply. Firmly embraced by me, Mark managed his last few pushes inside of me. With his last deep push I felt his entire body tensing up. Again I felt his ejaculation deep within me, and Mark uttered a loud groan of release.

Mark's body shuddered, and I felt almost every part of his orgasm as if it was one of my own. More sperm was coming out of him now, and already I could feel it leaking out of me. The bed was going to be a mess. Mark made a few short strokes with his still engorged organ, but his climax was quickly running to its end. With each soft push his body trembled, as his penis was now super sensitive. At last, I could feel his dick becoming a little smaller, and he began to pull out.

A slurping sound was heard as he pulled out, and as exhausted as I was, I still managed a weak giggle. Both exhausted, we managed to displace our bodies a little to avoid the stain in the sheet. Mark turned me on my side and pushed himself against my back, spooning me. I felt his limp penis settling in the crack between my upper thighs. Mark then used his arms to hug me tightly. I generally love hugs, and way Mark was holding me now was maybe the best hug I ever had.

My eyes were on the clock on the nightstand. I was amazed it was only a few minutes after one. My most thorough fuck ever had lasted little over ten minutes. Still a record for me, of course, but it had seemed to last hours. Completely exhausted, I fell asleep into a very warm dream of which I remember nothing.

Chapter Five

I slept deeply, but when I woke up I first entered a half waking state in which I realized only little of where I was. I first noticed the clock, which was on 4.12 AM. I felt Mark's arms around me, and this felt very good. I felt Marks body against me, and the warm feeling it caused was also very pleasant. I felt a wet spot at my knees, and I realized it was probably the considerable stain we had caused earlier that hadn't dried up yet. Then I realized I also felt Mark's penis, once again erect and throbbing, pushing against the crack of my ass.

This shocked me at first, and I briefly considered Mark was trying to screw me in my sleep. But as I became a little more awake, I began noticing what was really happening. Mark's breathing was short and agitated, but his embrace was still a bit loose. He was holding as still as he could, and only his dick was actively pushing against me. I guessed he was awake, exited and ready to go, so to speak, but also keeping quiet in an effort not to wake me.

I considered briefly to hold still and pretend I was still sleeping. Perhaps Mark would fall asleep eventually. But then I remembered how long he had been hard the previous times. This had to be quite uncomfortable for him, and who knew how long he had been awake already at that moment. I thought about asking if he was awake, but decided against it. There had been very little talk between us, and action had always seemed more appropriate. I lifted my leg a little to allow for a little room between my thighs. With a short jerk, Mark's dick slipped between my legs and pressed against my labia. I turned my head sideways and his lips found mine soon enough.

Mark clearly didn't want to sacrifice his hold on me to allow for better kissing, so it was a light touch that emphasized the contact at my mound. One of his hands had cupped one of my breasts. Despite Mark having large hands he couldn't cup it completely, so held it as best as he could as he started tweaking the nipple.

His other hand explored my pussy lips. I was only awake for a few minutes, so I wasn't as moist as I had been before. Mark realized he had some work to do, so he licked his own fingers and began massaging my pussy lips. After moistening the outer lips my pussy slowly began juicing up. Mark switched his attention to my clit, circling it with one finger and occasionally giving it a flick. Meanwhile, he shifted his position a little, and the head of his dick was soon locked again against my opening. He was clearly working to moisten things so he could squeeze his dick in once again. And if I didn't know better, I would have considered all this very self-centered.

Again, Mark felt resistance from my tightness as he tried to push in. My guess was he had been awake for some time, holding still with only his erection telling him to make his move. He was clearly impatient and was pushing at my entrance despite the current lack of fluids there to make it easy. Back in my college days, I had resorted to blowing my boyfriend off when my pussy didn't appear to be in the mood. But by know I knew that getting this huge organ in my mouth was impossible. If Mark was going to get a release, for the third time I might add, it was going to have to be inside me again.

I took hold of the penis' tip and began smearing some juices over it. Part of me wanted my body to recover for a few weeks, but part of me wanted to have sex again as I we had had only a few hours ago. It took a good few minutes, and I felt Mark pushing impatiently, but then I decided I was as slick as I was going to be. I pushed the head of his penis against my entrance, and pushed down a little.

Sensing my effort, Mark pushed upward himself and the miracle happened: he slipped in. Marks left hand was still holding my breast, he now used his other hand to firmly grasp my hip. He started his inand out motions again and began pushing himself half way inside me again. From behind, He was able to get three quarters of his dick in before movement would be uncomfortable.

This time I was completely locked in my current position. Mark's arms and body were keeping me in this position and I realized I was only able to move by fighting Mark. At that particular moment I thought realized what it felt like to be a sex object. I was merely here to be wrapped around Mark's dick and relieve him of excess sperm, though I had to doubt he had excess left. More likely, he was tapping into the reserves now. Then, I felt Mark slowing down his motions again, probably prolonging the sex again.

After a short pause during which he kissed me deeply, he began to slowly fuck me again. It was nothing like the thorough fuck he had given me earlier, during which he had been able to slide his entire length in and out of me, but my pussy was being stretched to her limits once again. Mark made no effort to hold back this time, a few minutes later his strokes became shorter and shorter until he made one final push deep inside of me while his entire body stiffened as he came deep inside me for the third time.

He embraced me tightly as he came, and I felt his body shudder for minutes. It was truly an intimate moment, as he groaned in my neck and trembled against me. Again I felt him ejaculate inside me, and again I felt his fluids run out of me a few moments later. It all made a sticky mess on my inner thigh this time. And as Mark finally pulled out of me, I declared this a perfect time to visit my bathroom.

Mark and I cleaned ourselves up as well as we could, and I managed to clean up some mess with the towel I had used earlier. All this time no words were spoken, but as soon as I returned to bed, Mark kissed me deeply and looked at me with a smile that said a thousand words. Either he was a good faker, or he was thoroughly enjoying himself here tonight. This pleased me, though I had to admit I would have preferred Mark with a slightly smaller penis.

The thought itself amused me though. Back in college, us girls had joked endlessly about guys who were well hung. And here I was. feeling sorry for myself because I had been stretched open like I had been. Still, I didn't feel any pain, just the sensation of being stretched. Like when you spread your legs a little further than you know you should.

After a few deep kisses, Mark amused himself with massaging my breast for a few minutes. He was lying on his back, and I had my head on his shoulder. Both of us were rapidly falling asleep. If I hadn't been completely exhausted before, I was now. Even Mark, with his athletic build and excellent shape seemed somewhat tired. He was warm and a bit sweaty, and his breathing was deep for a few minutes. My free hand was firmly embedded in Mark's chest hair as I finally dozed off.

Chapter Six

A healthy dose of sunlight was creeping into my room, and the clock was about to show the 8 am in the morning. I hadn't set the alarm, and despite my exhaustion in the middle of the night, I had woken up in time to be able to go to work. Not that I was going anywhere in a hurry, though. I was expected at nine, but it generally wasn't a problem if I was a little late. I had already decided to make use of that privilege. Not only was I too tired to go anywhere quickly, I was also quite comfortable in my current position. Mark was lying on his back, still asleep, and I had my head on his shoulder, my left hand softly stroking his muscular chest.

It was warm in my room, and the covers were turned back. With Mark lying on his back, his almost ever present erection was clearly in my sight. I was familiar with this concept, an erection in the morning when the owner was still asleep, and it had always fascinated me a little. I also knew that these morning erections could sometimes result in wet dreams when there was excess sperm to get rid off. I had witnessed this myself with my college boyfriend on some morning when I had refused sex the night before, and it had been very exciting to watch. I didn't expect anything like that to happen now, though. Mark was certainly without excess sperm at the moment.

I took this quiet moment to examine Mark's impressive penis. It was beautifully shaped, with a slight curve upward in the shaft, and a large pink head at the top. I still had difficulty imagining this size being able to fit inside me, but I was no longer nervous about having to fit it in. It had been done before, if Mark wanted to put his morning erection to good use, it would be possible again. I cupped Mark's balls softly, and gave them a gentle squeeze.

His dick twitched a little, and started to leak a little pre cum. With a naughty smile I slowly raised myself and bent over Mark's dick. I licked the head of it, then softly put my lips around it, taking in as much as I could without using my teeth. Mark's dick twitched again, and he moaned softly. He was still asleep, and I was almost convinced I was able to make him come in his sleep like this. I realized that everything that was happening right now was strictly biological, and had little to do with me. So, I decided to postpone my efforts and wake up Mark first.

Bending over his face, with my breasts pushing into his chest hair, tickling me slightly, I softly pushed my lips against his and started kissing him. It took me a few moments of soft kissing, before I noticed a response. Mark began kissing me back, and soon enough I felt his arms slipping around me. The kissing was good, and I wanted to go on for a while, but I knew that if I waited too long, Mark would probably take over.

I broke the kiss, and made a slow trail of kisses down towards his waiting dick. When I arrived, it seemed to have grown even more, perhaps with the excitement of the moment, or the anticipation of more sex. In any case, there had been no way I would have been able to give Mark a proper blow job before, and there was certainly no way now. But I didn't care, I would do my best to give Mark a good time waking up.

I wrapped my hands around the shaft, and began stroking it gently. I used my mouth to give the head of dick very wet kisses, making sure to use a lot of tongue. Mark had surrendered completely to me and was enjoying the ride. After a few minutes of this, Mark let out a soft groan, and began to involuntarily push his hips upward. I began to slowly speed up my pace of my strokes and applied a little more pressure on the shaft. I kept this up several minutes, during which Mark seemed to be getting closer and closer to coming.

He began bucking his hips upward, and was now breathing loudly. I realized I was going to be able to do what I hadn't been able to do last night, making Mark come without having to squeeze his ample size inside of me. Part of me welcomed this, put part of me also wanted to do this the 'proper' way. I hesitated for a moment, and shifted my position. During this slight movement, I felt a warm slippery feeling between my legs and I realized I was very wet with excitement myself!

That settled it, my body had apparently made its decision. I contemplated for a moment lying down and have Mark on top of me, but in a bold moment I decided to mount Mark myself. I straddled his chest, and kissed him deeply. Mark's response was very passionate and almost uncontrolled, but I quickly felt him raising his hips in an effort to make contact. I broke the kiss, and moved down, settling across his hips. When I lowered myself, I felt his throbbing rod pushing against my ass. Supporting myself with one hand, I reached between my legs and firmly took hold of Mark's dick, and guided the head towards the slick opening of my pussy.

I tried to push it in gently, but again I felt resistance. Frustration took a hold of me for a moment. We were both as slippery as we were going to get, and I had been able to squeeze Mark's monstrous dick inside me three times already. Mark groaned, he was close now. He balled his hands into fists, clearly restraining himself from doing the big push himself. I was getting a little desperate myself as well. How much getting used to Mark's size would I need? I guessed it wasn't going to be a fast entry anytime soon. I rubbed the head of Marks dick against my opening, then lodged it's tip firmly inside of me. I shifted my weight a little, resting myself a little on Mark's penis.

That did the trick; the pressure applied and the slickness of the head allowed me to slide him in slowly. I lowered myself ever so slowly, sometimes stopping for a moment to adjust the angle. Mark groaned some more, his eyes closed. This time he was really putting in some effort to control himself. I was glad he did this time, it would be a shame if Mark came only moments after I finally squeezed him in.

Finally, my butt came to a rest straddling Mark's hips. I was sitting up straight, and I remembered that this was one position I had always tried to avoid. It made such a display of my breasts, especially with the sunlight now completely lighting my room. And if I wanted to bend over to kiss Mark, they would hang from my chest like big udders. But even after one short night, I was now completely comfortable with Mark, though I decided I wouldn't be bending over to kiss him just yet.

My pussy once again felt completely stretched to its natural limit, and I realized this was probably the first time I had his entire length inside of me. The word 'impaled' came to mind, and I began to wonder if I was able to move in this position..

"You look absolutely gorgeous," Mark commented with a smile, and his compliment managed to deepen my blush. He reached up, and tried to hold a breast in each of his hands. He rubbed them a few times, and then tweaked the nipples. He then dropped his arms to my hips again, and took a good hold of them. I wriggled a little, and tried to make an up-and-down movement, but I failed miserably. Mark then reached up again, and took hold of my face.

He gently pulled me towards him, until I was bent down, kissing Mark deeply. Now, I was lying on top of Mark, my legs spread wide open and his massive cock still inside me. After the deep kiss, Mark moved his hands to my ass cheeks, and squeezed them. At the same time, he began his own sliding motions. In this position, I was able to meet his thrusts a little.

With all the slickness, we were soon making sopping sounds, and Mark was sliding half his length in and out of me with relative ease. I still felt stretched, but I was apparently getting used to it. The fast fucking Mark was doing to me felt wonderful, and after a few minutes I felt him getting irregular at his strokes. When he nearly came, he grasped me firmly, and pushed in and out of me slowly and deeply a few last times. Then I felt his body tense up completely as he gave the final push. Again, I felt his sperm shooting inside of me, with a force as if Mark hadn't had sex in months. Mark groaned loudly, and again his climax felt partly as one of my own.

We lay there like that for minutes. Mark on his back, me on top of him. My breasts squeezed in between us, his engorged dick still inside me, and his sperm slowly leaking out of me. I hardly noticed all of this. Our heads were close but we weren't kissing; we both needed the air I suppose. After minutes of lying like this, I slipped off of him, and curled up beside him. I was gently drifting back to sleep, when I realized that getting to work somewhere today seemed like a prudent idea. It took all of my motivation, but I managed to get up out of bed. My legs hurt from the exercise, both last night and throughout the night. I bent over Mark and kissed him lightly on the lips: "I’m going to take a shower."

Chapter Seven

With slow painful movements I made my way to the shower. On the way, I glanced in the mirror. My God, I was a mess. My face was all red and my hair was pointing in every direction. A shower would take care of all of that, though. A long, hot shower, that would do the trick. I slipped into the stall and turned on the water. Moments later I was thoroughly washing my hair, and I made sure I really took my time with this. While I was massaging my hair, I couldn't help but wonder if this what Mark's relation had been like, and if it would be like this if we would see each other again.

Four highly intensive love making sessions in a night was already hard work, but what if you got all of this on a regular basis? I wasn't really enthusiastic at the thought, but part of me was thrilled just thinking about it. Did Mark and his ex make love every night? Did they make love more than once, every night? Mark did seem quite a lot more potent than most guys I had been with. I wondered how I would hold up, being with a stallion like Mark. Because that was what he was, as close to a stallion as a man could get. I couldn't make a decision at that time, I was both inclined to believe I wouldn't last a week, and that it would be a sexual heaven.

I was about to start rinsing the shampoo out of my hair when I heard the door open. Seconds later, Mark slipped into the shower with me. I had my eyes closed because of the shampoo, so I couldn’t verify, but I fully expected a fully engorged erection to be squeezed against me in moments. But when Mark embraced me and carefully kissed me on the lips, I felt no such thing. For a moment I was disappointed, then I almost had to laugh at myself. So he wasn’t Superman quite yet, even though he had come a very long way. Mark started soaping himself while I rinsed out the shampoo. I was then able to verify his dick had returned to normal proportions. I smiled, and became convinced I had finally tamed the wild beast at Mark's crotch.

Mark took my shower gel, and slowly began soaping me in. As could be expected he took a long time soaping and massaging my breasts. He slowly rubbed them in circling motions, while he bent his head to kiss me. We stood there kissing and petting while all the soap washed from our bodies. I then turned off the shower, and continued kissing for a few moments, our dripping wet bodies squeezed together. I then got out of the shower, and handed Mark a towel.

Later, we were having a quick and quiet breakfast. I was amazed how few were words were being spoken between us, but it hardly bothered me. Maybe someday I would have a long conversation with Mark, or maybe not. Maybe I would see Mark again, or maybe not. Maybe we would have sex again some day, or maybe not. First, I would have to figure if I wanted that, at all.

After a while, the silence became uncomfortable, as breakfast finished for a few minutes already. Then, Mark picked up his coat and reached into the pocket. "I know its not the most romantic thing to do," he said, as he handed me a small business card, "but I can’t leave without at least giving you my address."

I smiled, thinking it was a bit of a blunt thing to do. I opened up my purse, and put Mark’s card in, and handed him one of my own in return. I grinned as he looked a little surprised at that. There, we had sex four incredibly intense times that night, and now simply exchanged business cards. As if we had met for a drink last night, and nothing else had happened.

The kiss goodbye at the door was almost one like on a first date. Nervous, and without any other contact than the lips. I sensed Mark’s hand was near my hip, but he didn’t touch me. For a moment, I thought of it as a final goodbye. Mark had had his pleasure for the night, and that would be it for us. Part of me was relieved. But when he looked back as he took the stairs, his eyes said something else. He would call me again someday. And as I stood there watching him leave, I relived the warmth of the night. Part of me wanted him to call again. Part of me needed to.

Epilogue:

Way past lunch time, I confessed to the other girls that I ‘met a guy’ at the gym last night. I assured them I had been a good girl, and nothing had happened, but I suppose they knew better from the look of me. I had to describe Mark detail, and as soon as they found out he was a hunk, I had to describe him in more detail.

"Does he have a big one?" Cathy asked at one point. "How am I supposed to know?!" I exclaimed in return.

"Well you said he had tight shorts," Cathy replied, with a grin on her face. "Don’t tell me you didn’t check out his package?"

My face became a deep shade of red. "I suppose he had nothing to be ashamed of there," I answered, not doing Mark’s godly rod any justice.

We spent the rest of the day arguing if I should call Mark again, and when I should do that. Or if I should wait for Mark to call me again, and how eager I should be to see him again. You know, girl stuff. That night, the three of us went out for drinks, and although we talked about a lot of things, Mark returned often as a subject. Late at night, I managed to confess I had slept with Mark and Cathy’s first response had been a playful: "Oh you naughty slut!"

Then, of course, she wanted to verify again if he had had a big one. I confirmed this in very vague descriptions, still not doing his godly rod any justice. Tanya had then called me a very lucky girl with an evil smile, and the discussion had then returned to me and Mark seeing each other again.

Two days later, we were still giggling about it, and the other girls were still pestering me. Mark however, hadn’t called yet. Only part of me regretted that. The other part, didn’t even dare to pick up the phone when it rang. I probably would see him at the gym again, but would he call before then? I didn’t know if I dared to hope for it.