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By Kristen

Kriste was jarred awake; fear paralyzing her. She felt invisible hands groping, pulling and pinching at her flesh and her mind spun in a haze of shock and disbelief as she gradually realized what was happening to her.
She was being punished!
It was the dreaded "hazing of the unpopular" and she couldn’t believe that her classmates were actually inflicting it on her. She could hear urgent whispering by the men around her bed and feel their hands groping at her breasts and pinching her nipples. Someone was fondling her crotch; there was a hand over her mouth; and more hands were holding her arms and legs immobile.
It seemed to go on forever; Kriste twisted and squirmed, trying vainly to fight off her tormentors. When someone forced his fingers inside her vagina, pushing them in deep, she couldn’t hold back any longer.
A strangled sound came from her throat and she began to sob uncontrollably. The cadets who’d been molesting her realized that they’d done enough and quickly dispersed to their own dorm rooms, leaving the young woman huddled in a ball, sobbing quietly. Her humiliation was complete. How could she face them all in the morning? How could she go on after this?

Kriste had been so proud, so excited, when the letter with the congressional seal had arrived, informing her that she’d been nominated to attend the Air Force Academy. She was on cloud nine for the whole last semester of her freshman year at junior college.Having planned and worked toward such a moment ever since her sophomore year in high school, actually to be accepted had been a pinnacle of achievement.
Kriste arrived in Colorado Springs all by herself and though she tried to make herself agreeable the obvious fact that many of the male cadets resented her presence had thrown cold water on her enthusiasm. They had continually harassed both her and her roommate, Darleen, the only other female cadet at the academy during that winter term.
The pressure placed on them both had been almost overwhelming, but Kriste remained positive and was determined to succeed, no matter what. Moreover, she intended it to be on merit and not by following the path Darleen had taken.
She looked over at Darleen’s empty bed and wondered if she was fucking the group captain again. If Darleen had been in their room as she was supposed to be, the attack that Kriste had just been subjected to would probably not have happened. Her thoughts were bitter as she rocked back and forth, still sobbing, unable to control the feelings of loneliness washing over her.
Slowly her sobs subsided and a determined expression transformed her pretty face. Her thoughts turned towards home, to school friends and she was swept away by an intense longing for friends and family. For people who loved her and would protect her and accept her for who she was.
Kriste glanced at her roommate’s empty bed again and thought to herself grimly: ‘I’d rather die than follow Darleen’s example. I’ll just have to take it I guess.’
She understood why her roommate had taken the group captain as a lover. It had stopped the other men on base from hitting on her, whereas Kriste had to continually fend off such advances. She thought bitterly: ‘I just want to become a combat pilot, and I don’t want to have to date the whole damn squadron to get there! Why can’t they give me a little respect? What’s wrong with me anyway? Why don’t they like me?’
What she’d experienced only moments ago was probably retaliation for her continual rejection of the advances made by her male classmates. Some of the guys in her training platoon obviously thought it was a great joke to hit on her. At first she used to explain to them why she thought it wasn’t a good idea to be romantically involved. When that didn’t work, she had become more blunt. She knew that they called her a "lezbo" and "the ice queen", behind her back, but she tried to ignore it. After all, she had a goal and she didn’t want anything or anybody getting in the way of it.Kriste shivered when she thought that this same "lesson" might well be "taught" to her again. She hadn’t had that much experience with boys in high school, most of her extra time being taken up with ROTC activities and a rigorous exercise and study schedule after school. She wanted to be fully prepared if she ever got the chance to become an Air Force cadet. She wanted to be the best there ever was, to do something special with her life.
The realization that this nocturnal incident had been the first time she’d ever had her body "intimately" touched by a man made her cry again. Her dreams had always been of a knight in shining armor, not a bunch of grubby unseen hands grabbing and pulling at her. It hadn’t been anything close to proper sex, not at all like the stories her girlfriends used to tell each other about their own experiences with boys.
Kriste had never had any stories to tell, but her friends admired her anyway for what she was trying to accomplish. Moreover, becoming popular at school had always come easily to her. Here at the academy though, things were different. Her blonde, peaches-and-cream good looks were almost a liability. For the first time in her life Kriste wished she had been born a man, or even an ugly woman; then maybe they’d just leave her alone to pursue her dream unmolested.
She lay restless in her bunk, unable to sleep. Dawn had begun to show its cold light through the barracks window when she heard her roommate stumble over something as she made her way into her bunk.
"Krissy, you awake?" asked Darleen.
Kriste considered pretending to be asleep, not wanting to talk just then. She was still mad at Darleen for breaking the rules, thus leaving her vulnerable to the attack by her fellow classmates. She realized, however, that Darleen would persist until she was answered - it was her way.
"Yes, Dar, I’m awake." And then inquired in a sarcastic tone, "Did you and Ron have fun last night?"
Darleen sat down on her own bunk and pulled her T-shirt over her head, carelessly exposing her breasts to anyone who might be passing the half-open door to their room. She’d obviously come straight from her lover; her nipples were swollen and pink, as if someone had been sucking them. Kriste felt a stirring deep in the pit of her stomach as she thought about what her roommate must have been doing all night.
Darleen noticed her stare and smiled complacently. "Yeah, he was up to it all right. And how did you enjoy your evening?" she asked in a knowing tone.
The bitch! So she knew what had happened last night! Had she known before, or only afterwards? "I didn’t sleep all that well. And if you’re referring to what some of our fellow cadets did to me last night, I just want to say: thanks for warning me."
Darleen felt a little sorry that she’d treated the matter as a joke, but she hated not being as strong as Kriste and it made her feel a little better about herself to have her roommate taken down a peg or two.
"I’m sorry, Kris; I didn’t know it was going to happen, honest! I just heard about it a few minutes ago as I was going down the hall. All the guys were talking about it. If it makes you feel any better, David told several of them how stupid they were and that you could make a complaint against them. I heard him say he wouldn’t blame you if you did."
Kriste had no intention of making a formal complaint, but as the day wore on and sly looks from some of the men in her training platoon made her relive last night’s humiliation, she realized that she’d have to do something. So that evening she requested an interview with one of the base counselors for morning sick-call, maybe she needed professional advice.

Making it through the next night without incident, Kriste showed up in front of Lt. Beal’s office for her 0700 appointment. The young woman hadn’t previously taken advantage of any medical services and wasn’t too happy about doing so now, but she felt she had to talk to someone other than Darleen about her fears and anxieties.
Lt. Beal turned out to be an old war horse with over twenty five years in the Air Force. Kriste was disappointed when she realize that she would get no sympathy there. Lt. Beal’s solution was a simple one.
"Girl, you sound a little uptight to me. When I was you’re age, I’d have paid money to get a bunch of handsome cadets to feel me up. I suggest you consider making some lucky young man a little gift of that virginity of yours. Have some good sex and you’ll be right as rain."

As she walked to Logistics class, the phrase "Make some young man a gift of that virginity of yours" kept running through Kriste’s head. At nineteen, she hadn’t yet had any kind of sex with another person. Could she herself be the problem? Was she the one who was strange? Might she have brought the events of the other night on herself by being so uptight about sex? The question preyed on her mind all day.
She’s always known what she had wanted and boys weren’t part of it. But now, on the threshold of realizing everything she’d worked for so long, everything was turning out to be a disaster. None of her classmates liked her and she couldn’t make any friends. Maybe she was going about it the wrong way.
As Kriste sat alone at dinner that evening, a distracted look on her face, a young cadet came and sat beside her.
"Mind if I sit here, sweetie?"
Normally Kriste would have said something like, "Don’t call me sweetie. I have a name, you know!" Now, however, she just looked at him and smiled wanly. He was John Davenport, the guy with the rich family from Boston. Kriste had never liked him; to her he seemed just a loud-mouth. During actual flight training she’d performed much better than him and he’d been less than gracious about it.
On an impulse she said, "Would you like to go out with me tonight?"
For once Johnny didn’t have a smart comeback. For an awkward moment he just sat there with his mouth open looking at her. But at last he recovered his composure. "Sure, honey, I’d like that just fine. But what made you change your mind about dating?"
Kriste took a deep breath and said, in a determined voice, "I’ve decided to have sex with a man and you’re it. So how about it?" She felt so nervous that she almost fainted; the decision to offer herself to a fellow classmate had taken all her courage. She’d ignored sex all her life, but here she was, effectively asking a man to fuck her. Her heart was pounding as she waited for his reply.
As for Johnny Davenport, he was almost speechless, stuttering: "S-sex? With me? I don’t get it?" He stared at his pretty classmate amazed.
Kriste stood up, dinner tray in hand and said in a voice that she hoped sounded inviting, "You’ll ‘get it’ all right. Tonight, I promise you. But do me a favor and keep it secret, will you?" She looked at the young man until, as if awakening from a trance, he came to life, "Ah... sure, sweetie. I promise... our little secret..."
Kriste stood for a moment longer looking down at him and then turned to go, saying over her shoulder, "I’ll meet you in town at the Blue Bird. Why don’t you get us a room?"

Kriste hurried back to her dorm room, a vicious case of butterflies beating around in her stomach.
Darleen was dressing for that night’s date. "You meeting Ron in town tonight, Darleen?"
Her roommate grinned and nodded. She was pulling on one of her short skirts, which barely covered her bottom. Kriste wondered how she could sit without making a show of herself; then she thought: ‘But that’s probably the idea.’ Returning to the question she really wanted to ask, Kriste said, "Would you mind dropping me off in town?"
Darleen shot her one of her ‘Darleen’ looks. "What, at the library?" She was being sarcastic, but Kriste didn’t notice. She was so nervous and confused that she actually said, "No, I’m meeting Johnny at the Blue Bird and I just need a ride, that’s all."
Darleen turned to look at her roommate. "You’re what? You and Johnny? Oh man, now I’ve heard everything. Why’d you pick a jerk like that to go out with?"
Kriste looked hurt for a moment, but then, trying to sound confident, she said, "I’m not marrying the man. I just need to lose my cherry and I think he’ll do."
Her roommate must have thought of something funny, because she laughed. However, she agreed to drop Kriste off at the motel.

It was after eight when Darleen left Kriste in the motel parking lot. At the last moment, Darleen, feeling some concern for her roommate said, "Do you want to ask me about anything? Should I come back in an hour to see if you need a ride back to base?"
But Kriste had already steeled herself for the coming event and just wanted to get it over with. She found her friend’s questions distracting because they required her to think and she didn’t want to think right then. She replied, "No thanks Dar. I’m okay, but thanks, anyway." She squeezed her roommate’s hand as she exited the car.
Darleen watched her Levi-clad friend walk toward the motel office. ‘That bastard Johnny better appreciate what he’s getting tonight,’ she thought, while guessing that he probably wouldn’t.